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My Name is Red            Orhan Pamuk

You slew a man and then fell out with one another concerning him。

—Koran; “The Cow。”

The blind and the seeing are not equal。

—Koran; “The Creator。”

To God belongs the East and the West。

I AM A CORPSE

I am nothing but a corpse now; a body at the bottom of a well。 Though I drew

my last breath long ago and my heart has stopped beating; no one; apart from

that vile murderer; knows what’s happened to me。 As for that wretch; he felt

for my pulse and listened for my breath to be sure I was dead; then kicked me

in the midriff; carried me to the edge of the well; raised me up and dropped

me below。 As I fell; my head; which he’d smashed with a stone; broke apart;

my face; my forehead and cheeks; were crushed; my bones shattered; and my

mouth filled with blood。

For  nearly  four  days  I  have  been  missing:  My  wife  and  children  must  be

searching for me; my daughter; spent from crying; must be staring fretfully at

the  courtyard  gate。  Yes;  I  know  they’re  all  at  the  window;  hoping  for  my

return。

But;  are  they  truly  waiting?  I  can’t  even  be  sure  of  that。  Maybe  they’ve

gotten used to my absence—how dismal! For here; on the other side; one gets

the  feeling  that  one’s  former  life  persists。  Before  my  birth  there  was  infinite

time; and after my death; inexhaustible time。 I never thought of it before: I’d

been living luminously between two eternities of darkness。

I was happy; I know now that I’d been happy。 I made the best illuminations

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