sword cut first through my hand and then clear through my neck; lopping off
my head。
I knew I’d been beheaded from the two odd steps taken by my poor body
which had left me behind in its confusion; from the stupid manner in which
my hand waved the dagger and from the way my lonely body collapsed; blood
spraying from the neck like a fountain。 My poor feet; which continued to
move as though still walking; kicked uselessly like the legs of a dying horse。
From the muddy ground upon which my head had fallen; I could neither
see my murderer nor my satchel full of gold pieces and pictures; which I still
wanted to cling to tightly。 These things were behind me; in the direction of the
hill leading down to the sea and Galleon Harbor which I would never reach。
My head would never again turn and see them; or the rest of the world。 I
forgot about them and let my thoughts take me away。
This is what occurred to me the moment before I was beheaded: The ship
shall depart from the harbor; this was joined in my mind with a mand to
hurry; it was the way my mother would say “hurry” when I was a child。
Mother; my neck aches and all is still。
This is what they call death。
But I knew that I wasn’t dead yet。 My punctured pupils were motionless;
but I could still see quite well through my open eyes。
What I saw from ground level filled my thoughts: The road inclining slightly
upward; the wall; the arch; the roof of the workshop; the sky…this is how the
picture receded。
It seemed as if this moment of observation went on and on and I realized
seeing had bee a variety of memory。 I was reminded of what I thought
when staring for hours at a beautiful picture: If you stare long enough your
mind enters the time of the painting。
All time had now bee this time。
It seemed as if no one would see me; as my thoughts faded away; my mud…
covered head would go on staring at this melancholy incline; the stone wall
and the nearby yet unattainable mulberry and chestnut trees for years。
This endless waiting suddenly assumed such bitter and tedious proportions;
I wanted nothing more than to quit this time。