迪文小说

特别的追悼 an ecial funeral（第1页）

佚名onymous

Whydidthememoryofthatdeadchildseekmeoutonthisbeautifulday?Tillthen，nointimationofsorrowhadcometomethroughthedazzlingrevelationsofasummerthatsang。

Ithaenedmanyyearsago。IhadjustarrivedinasmallvillageinManitoba，Canada，tofinishtheschoolyearasrelacementforateacherwhohadfallenillorsimly，forallIknew，becomediscouraged。

“Whenthetimecomesforyoutoalyforaermanentosition，”therincialofthenormalschoolhadtoldme，“Youllbeabletosaythatyouvehadexerience。”

AndsoIfoundmyselfinsringinthatveryoorvillage—justafewshacks，withnothingaroundbutsindlingsrucetrees。“Amonth，”Iaskedmyself，“willthatbelongenoughtobecomeattachedtothechildren?Willamonthbeworththeeffort?”

Perhasthesamecalculationwasinthemindsofthechildren，forIhadneverseenfacessodejected，soaatheticorerhassorrowful。Ihadhadsolittleexerience。Imyselfwashardlymorethanachild。

Nineoclockcame。Theroomwashotasanoven。SometimesinManitobaanincredibleheatsettlesinduringthefirstdaysofJune。

Scarcelyknowingwhereorhowtobegin，Ioenedtheattendancebookandcalledtheroll。ThenameswereforthemostartFrench，andtodaytheystillreturntomymemory，likethis，fornoreason:MadeleineBerube，JosehatBrisset，EmilienDumont，CecileLeine。。。

Butmostofthechildrenwhoroseandanswered“Present，mamzelle”，whentheirnameswerecalledhadtheslightlynarrowedeyes，warmcoloringandjet-blackhairthattoldofmetisblood。

Theywerebeautifulandexquisitelyolite;therewasreallynothingtoreroachthemforexcettheinconceivabledistancetheymaintainedbetweenthemselvesandme。Itcrushedme。“Isthiswhatchildrenarelike，then，”Iaskedmyselfwithanguish，“untouchable，barricadedinsomeregionwhereyoucantreachthem?”

IcametothenameYolandeChartrand。

Nooneanswered。Ireeatedthenameand，whentherewasstillnoanswer，Ilookeduatfacesthatseemedtomecomletelyindifferent。

Thenfromthebackoftheclassroom，abovethebuzzingofflies，aroseavoiceIcouldntlaceatfirst。“Shesdead，mamzelle。Shediedlastnight。”

Perhasevenmoredistressingthanthenewswasthecalm，leveltoneofthechildsvoice。

“Ah，”Isaid，lostforwords。

Welookedatoneanotherinsilenceforalongtime，thechildrenandI。NowIunderstoodthattheexressionintheireyesthatIhadtakenforindifferencewasaheavysadness。

“SinceYolande。。。wasyourschoolmate。。。wouldyoulike。。。afterschoolatfouroclock。。。forustogoandvisither?”

Onthesmall，muchtooseriousfacesthereaearedthetraceofsomesmiles，wary，stillsad，butsmilesjustthesame。

AtfirstastfourIfoundmostofthemwaitingformeatthedoor，agood20children，butmakingnomorenoisethaniftheywerebeingketinafterschool。Severalofthemwentaheadtoshowmetheway。Othersressedaroundmesoclosely。Icouldscarcelymove。Fiveorsixofthesmalleronestookmebythehandandulledmeforwardgentlyasiftheywereleadingablinderson。Theydidnottalk，merelyheldmeenclosedintheircircle。

Together，inthisway，wecametoawoodencabinstandinginisolationamongthinsrucetrees。Itsdoorwaswideoen，sowewereabletoseethedeadchildaloneintheroomfromquitefaroff。Shehadbeenlaidoutonroughboardssusendedbetweentwochairs。

Thearentshadundoubtedlydonealltheycouldfortheirchild。Theyhadcoveredherwithacleansheet。Hermother，robably，hadarrangedherhairinthetwoverytightbraidsthatframedthethinface。Butsomeressingneedhadsentthemaway:erhastheurchaseofacoffinintown，orafewmoreboardstomakeheronethemselves。

Thechildhadadelicatelittleface，verywasted，withtheseriousexressionIhadseenonthefacesofmostofthechildrenhere，asifthecaresoftheadultshadcrushedthemalltooearly。Shemighthavebeen10or11yearsold。

Thechildrenwerewatchingme。Irealizedtheynowexectedeverythingfromme，thoughIdidntknowmuchmorethanthey。ThenIhadasortofinsiration。

“DontyouthinkYolandewouldliketohavesomeonewithheralwaystillthetimecomestocommithertotheground?”

ThefacesofthechildrentoldmeIhadstrucktherightnote。

“Welltaketurnsthen，fourorfivearoundhereverytwohours，untilthefuneral。Wemustbecarefulnottoletthefliestouchherface。”

Theyagreedwithaglowintheirdarkeyes。Standingaroundme，theynowfeltatrustinmesocomlete，anditterrifiedme。

Inaclearingamongthesrucetreesashortdistanceaway，Inoticedabright-inkstainonthegroundwhosesourceIdidntyetknow。Thesunslantedonit，makingitflame，theonemomentinthisdaythathadbeentouchedbyacertaingrace。

“Whatsortofgirlwasshe?”Iasked。

Atfirstthechildrendidntunderstand。Thenaboyofaboutthesameagesaidwithtenderseriousness，“Shewassmart，Yolande。”

“Anddidshedowellinschool?”

“Shedidntcomeveryoftenthisyear。Shewasalwaysbeingabsent。”