迪文小说

第53部分（第1页）

wn。　After　a　brief　stay　there；　I　shall　bear　my　treasure　to　regions　nearer　the　sun：　to　French　vineyards　and　Italian　plains；　and　she　shall　see　whatever　is　famous　in　old　story　and　in　modern　record：　she　shall　taste；　too；　of　the　life　of　cities；　and　she　shall　learn　to　value　herself　by　just　parison　with　others。”

“Shall　I　travel？—and　with　you；　sir？”

“You　shall　sojourn　at　Paris；　Rome；　and　Naples：　at　Florence；　Venice；　and　Vienna：　all　the　ground　I　have　wandered　over　shall　be　re…trodden　by　you：　wherever　I　stamped　my　hoof；　your　sylph’s　foot　shall　step　also。　Ten　years　since；　I　flew　through　Europe　half　mad；　with　disgust；　hate；　and　rage　as　my　panions：　now　I　shall　revisit　it　healed　and　cleansed；　with　a　very　angel　as　my　forter。”

I　laughed　at　him　as　he　said　this。　“I　am　not　an　angel；”　I　asserted；　“and　I　will　not　be　one　till　I　die：　I　will　be　myself。　Mr。　Rochester；　you　must　neither　expect　nor　exact　anything　celestial　of　me—for　you　will　not　get　it；　any　more　than　I　shall　get　it　of　you：　which　I　do　not　at　all　anticipate。”

“What　do　you　anticipate　of　me？”

“For　a　little　while　you　will　perhaps　be　as　you　are　now；—a　very　little　while；　and　then　you　will　turn　cool；　and　then　you　will　be　capricious；　and　then　you　will　be　stern；　and　I　shall　have　much　ado　to　please　you：　but　when　you　get　well　used　to　me；　you　will　perhaps　like　me　again；—like　me；　I　say；　not　love　me。　I　suppose　your　love　will　effervesce　in　six　months；　or　less。　I　have　observed　in　books　written　by　men；　that　period　assigned　as　the　farthest　to　which　a　husband’s　ardour　extends。　Yet；　after　all；　as　a　friend　and　panion；　I　hope　never　to　bee　quite　distasteful　to　my　dear　master。”

“Distasteful！　and　like　you　again！　I　think　I　shall　like　you　again；　and　yet　again：　and　I　will　make　you　confess　I　do　not　only　like；　but　love　you—with　truth；　fervour；　constancy。”

“Yet　are　you　not　capricious；　sir？”

“To　women　who　please　me　only　by　their　faces；　I　am　the　very　devil　when　I　find　out　they　have　neither　souls　nor　hearts—when　they　open　to　me　a　perspective　of　flatness；　triviality；　and　perhaps　imbecility；　coarseness；　and　ill…temper：　but　to　the　clear　eye　and　eloquent　tongue；　to　the　soul　made　of　fire；　and　the　character　that　bends　but　does　not　break—at　once　supple　and　stable；　tractable　and　consistent—I　am　ever　tender　and　true。”

“Had　you　ever　experience　of　such　a　character；　sir？　Did　you　ever　love　such　an　one？”

“I　love　it　now。”

“But　before　me：　if　I；　indeed；　in　any　respect　e　up　to　your　difficult　standard？”

“I　never　met　your　likeness。　Jane；　you　please　me；　and　you　master　me—you　seem　to　submit；　and　I　like　the　sense　of　pliancy　you　impart；　and　while　I　am　twining　the　soft；　silken　skein　round　my　finger；　it　sends　a　thrill　up　my　arm　to　my　heart。　I　am　influenced—conquered；　and　the　influence　is　sweeter　than　I　can　express；　and　the　conquest　I　undergo　has　a　witchery　beyond　any　triumph　I　can　win。　Why　do　you　smile；　Jane？　What　does　that　inexplicable；　that　uncanny　turn　of　countenance　mean？”

“I　was　thinking；　sir　（you　will　excuse　the　idea；　it　was　involuntary）；　I　was　thinking　of　Hercules　and　Samson　with　their　charmers—”

“You　were；　you　little　elfish—”

“Hush；　sir！　You　don’t　talk　very　wisely　just　now；　any　more　than　those　gentlemen　acted　very　wisely。　However；　had　they　been　married；　they　would　no　doubt　by　their　severity　as　husbands　have　made　up　for　their　softness　as　suitors；　and　so　will　you；　I　fear。　I　wonder　how　you　will　answer　me　a　year　hence；　should　I　ask　a　favour　it　does　not　suit　your　convenience　or　pleasure　to　grant。”

“Ask　me　something　now；　Jane；—the　least　thing：　I　desire　to　be　entreated—”

“Indeed　I　will；　sir；　I　have　my　petition　all　ready。”

“Speak！　But　if　you　look　up　and　smile　with　that　countenance；　I　shall　swear　concession　before　I　know　to　what；　and　that　will　make　a　fool　of　me。”

“Not　at　all；　sir；　I　ask　only　this：　don’t　send　for　the　jewels；　and　don’t　crown　me　with　roses：　you　might　as　well　put　a　border　of　gold　lace　round　that　plain　pocket　handkerchief　you　have　there。”

“I　might　as　well　‘gild　refined　gold。’　I　know　it：　you　request　is　granted　then—for　the　time。　I　will　remand　the　order　I　despatched　to　my　banker。　But　you　have　not　yet　asked　for　anything；　you　have　prayed　a　gift　to　be　withdrawn：　try　again。”

“Well　then；　sir；　have　the　goodness　to　gratify　my　curiosity；　which　is　much　piqued　on　one　point。”

He　looked　disturbed。　“What？　what？”　he　said　hastily。　“Curiosity　is　a　dangerous　petition：　it　is　well　I　have　not　taken　a　vow　to　accord　every　request—”

“But　there　can　be　no　danger　in　plying　with　this；　sir。”

“Utter　it；　Jane：　but　I　wish　that　instead　of　a　mere　inquiry　into；　perhaps；　a　secret；　it　was　a　wish　for　half　my　estate。”

“Now；　King　Ahasuerus！　What　do　I　want　with　half　your　estate？　Do　you　think　I　am　a　Jew…usurer；　seeking　good　investment　in　land？　I　would　much　rather　have　all　your　confidence。　You　will　not　exclude　me　from　your　confidence　if　you　admit　me　to　your　heart？”

“You　are　wele　to　all　my　confidence　that　is　worth　having；　Jane；　but　for　God’s　sake；　don’t　desire　a　useless　burden！　Don’t　long　for　poison—don’t　turn　out　a　downright　Eve　on　my　hands！”

“Why　not；　sir？　You　have　just　been　telling　me　how　much　you　liked　to　be　conquered；　and　how　pleasant　over…persuasion　is　to　you。　Don’t　you　think　I　had　better　take　advantage　of　the　confession；　and　begin　and　coax　and　entreat—even　cry　and　be　sulky　if　necessary—for　the　sake　of　a　mere　essay　of　my　power？”

“I　dare　you　to　any　such　experiment。　Encroach；　presume；　and　the　game　is　up。”

“Is　it；　sir？　You　soon　give　in。　How　stern　you　look　now！　Your　eyebrows　have　bee　as　thick　as　my　finger；　and　your　forehead　resembles　what；　in　some　very　astonishing　poetry；　I　once　saw　styled；　‘a　blue…piled　thunderloft。’　That　will　be　your　married　look；　sir；　I　suppose？”