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I AM ESTHER
I was putting lentil soup on the boil for our evening meal when Nesim said;
“There’s a visitor at the door。” I replied; “Make sure the soup doesn’t burn;”
handing him the spoon and giving it a couple of turns in the pot while
holding his aged hand。 If you don’t show them; they’ll stand there for hours
idly holding the spoon in the pot。
When I saw Black at the door I felt nothing but pity for him。 There was such
an expression on his face I was afraid to ask what had happened。
“Don’t bother to e inside;” I said; “I’ll be out as soon as I change
clothes。”
I donned the pink and yellow garments that I wear when I’m invited to
Ramadan festivities; wealthy banquets and lengthy weddings; and took up my
holiday satchel。 “I’ll have my soup when I get back;” I said to poor Nesim。
Black and I had crossed one street in my little Jewish neighborhood whose
chimneys labor to expel their smoke; the way our kettles force out their steam;
and I said:
“Shekure’s former husband is back。”
Black fell silent and stayed that way until we left the neighborhood。 His face
was ashen; the color of the waning day。
“Where are they?” he asked sometime later。
From this question I guessed that Shekure and her children weren’t at
home。 “They’re at their house;” I said。 Because I meant Shekure’s previous
home; and knew at once that this would singe Black’s heart; I opened a door
of hope for him by tacking the word “probably” onto the end of my
statement。
“Have you seen her newly returned husband?” he asked me; looking deep
into my eyes。
“I haven’t seen him; neither did I see Shekure’s flight from the house。”
“How did you know they’d left?”
“From your face。”
“Tell me everything;” he said decisively。
Black was so troubled he didn’t understand that Esther—her eye eternally
at the window; her ear eternally to the ground—could never “tell everything”
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